So Tuesday night, the Hurricanes celebrate the arrival of their new comrades-in-arms by almost choking a three-goal lead to the Boston Bruins.
Last night, they celebrated my anniversary by beating the Pens down 4-2 and making Evgeni Malkin cry like a little bitch. Well OK, a big bitch.
In a development that has half the ASBOs in Western New York rejoicing in their MD20/20 (and has the more class-free members of the Pens Nation clapping for glee as well–my wife, OTOH, is none too happy), the Warchief is out for the season with a torn ACL. Was it a cheap hit? No. It was a “shit happens” thing–I didn’t see anything deliberate on the part of the Pens (as opposed, of course, to Brooks Orpik piledriving Erik Cole into the boards and breaking his neck–you still can’t convince me that it wasn’t deliberate).
Yes, I have a wife. Two of them! And a husband, and a husband-in-law too. Deal.
So yeah, anyway. The power play finally woke up last night, which was encouraging. It was very encouraging, but I won’t be fully encouraged until I see them keep it up.
Tomorrow night the ‘Canes will play the Panthers at the RBC. Wonder how long it’ll take before they get Vokoun to have another of his very entertaining meltdowns?
Ah yes, teh intarnets are all a-buzz with the latest from Dwayne-o:
Crackers is on waivers according to Tim Panaccio’s BFF, Cujo to the Hurricanes is an e4, and fans on X Random Messageboard are all a-twitter about it. I, on the other hand, am being smart about this (as are quite a few others).
Let’s look at the evidence, shall we?
1) The Hurricanes have nothing about it.
2) TSN has nothing about it.
3) The CBC has nothing about it.
4) Bristol has nothing about it.
Therefore, I’m pretty sure at the moment that if none of those proven reputable sources are saying Crackers is on waivers, then Crackers is not on waivers. If my own contacts inside the NHL aren’t saying Crackers is on waivers, then Crackers is not on waivers.
Fuck me, some of you mooks are so gullible. Really. If a Nigerian con-artist e-mails you offering you the princely sum of ten million dollars in exchange for helping him recover six hundred million from an inheritance left to him by his uncle Prince Cheatamugu, do you wire his ass sixty thousand dollars to cover bribes? Do you give all your money to Oral Roberts and Benny Hinn because they said that your bunions would stop hurting if you did? Do you fall for the magazine-sellers that come to the door and ask for cash moniez?
Think about that the next time you read something on Dwayne-O’s Blog O’Crap.
*throws papers in the air and walks away*
OK, this every-other crap has got to stop. Mind you, Friday’s win over the Capitals was no great shakes either–I’ll take that two points thank you kindly, but really. A little consistency would be good. Hells, the October ‘Canes would be good.
I don’t know what’s more frustrating to me, our sputtering power play or the toolbags IN OUR OWN FANBASE that are pissing and moaning that they’ve lost respect for Lavi or that the team sucks or that half the team needs to be traded RIGHT NOW.
Of course, these are the same idiots that piss and whine when we lose, and then turn around and say “YEAH GO TEAM GO WOOOO” when we win. So whatever.
The Hurricanes aren’t hitting anymore–except for Dennis, und Herzlichen Dank für ihn. OK, and Timmay too. Almost forgot him. But it’s like everyone else has suddenly decided to take a powder or something, and it makes me tear my hair out in frustration because I know what’s wrong, and I know that the team must know what’s wrong, but they’re not doing anything about it. They’re not skating. They’re trying to go for the cute pass and the “perfect” shot and all this other crap. They’re better than that. They know that, I know that, everyone except the biggest idiots from X Random Messageboard knows that.
But until knowledge translates into action, this team is going to keep sputtering and flaking out and driving me even more insane than I already am. Maybe this 8-1 beatdown will wind up being what the doctor ordered.
Last night was the HHOF induction ceremony, with all the requisite understated pomp and circumstance pertaining thereunto. Thank you, Time Warner Cable, for bringing me the NHL Network. Thank you from the bottom of my little black heart. And thank you to my husband for not deleting the ceremony from the DVR to make way for Heroes or Surface or some crap, like you’ve done so many other things that I had on there.
I’m sure that some of you have heard about Mike Flanagan’s little escapade at the fan forum Q&A the day before. I admit, I laughed when I read that blog entry–but the laughter was more at the thought of Stevens giving Mike the Hairy Eyeball than it was at Mike opening his yap like that. Mike’s question made me facepalm.
As much as I love Section 328 (even though I can’t sit there because the ‘Canes lose when I do), as much as I like Mike, and as much as I think that the hit Stevens laid on Francis was cheap (just like every other shoulder-and-elbow hit he’s ever laid), dudeman was totally in the wrong here. The venue was wholly inappropriate, and he didn’t do a good job representing the Caniac Nation there.
Sorry mang, ‘s just the way I see it.
IN OTHER NEWS:
Erik Cole got cleared to travel with the team to Tampa this morning–what we were all afraid would be a re-broken neck turned out to be an apparent stinger in the general area of his trapezius muscles. I’ve had those before, and they are wicked painful, so I can imagine why he thought his neck was hurt again. Ouch! Of course, this does nothing to change the fact that I hate the Panthers almost as much as the Red Wings. Just sayin’.
OK, so a dude at UConn made a comment that indicates that he misses the Whalers–how does that make him stupid? “Get over it”? What?
The Whale is gone, and everyone except the handful of fruits and nuts in the 13th of April Movement (or whatever the “Return Hartford Whalers Organization” is calling itself these days) has come to grips with it even after 10 years. Some fans followed the team here, some gave up the NHL altogether, some migrated to other teams. Big. Deal. Mentioning the Whale is not a crime, last I checked–the franchise has finally figured that out, and no longer shies away from showing Whalers jerseys on the jumbotron or the TV telecasts (or playing “Brass Bonanza” on the PA).
Brian DeMarco (the columnist at UConn) was complimentary toward the Hurricanes, so I don’t see what warranted the aggro there. Perhaps somebody could point it out to me, please.
Continuing to show ass toward folks that mention the Whale is counterproductive. It serves even less purpose than the internecine wars that marked the birth of the Hurricanes did. One cannot figure out where he is going unless he knows his past–that goes for teams as well. Sweeping the past under the rug serves no constructive purpose, and in the end is only self-destructive because it’ll invariably lead to a redux of past missteps and mistakes.
OK, so I’m reading a message-board thread, and I find this smelly little road-apple dropped right in the middle of it:
All and all, Carolina is the best team in the division and should be able to secure a 3rd seed in the Eastern Conference
And I, of course, was done. I am sick and tired of this “oh, we should get the third seed cos we won the Division” crap. I may be one to hedge my bets and say “I hope they do well this season”–but my expectations are pretty plain.
CUP. OR. BUST.
With that comes FIRST. OR. BUST. Why? Simple: I am sick and frakkin’ tired of the Southeast winding up (more often than not) “third by default” instead of “third on points”, which has happened in every season except for 2004 and 2006. Nobody of course says anything when it’s the Northeast winding up third-by-default (hello, Boston)–but the Southeast? PMF CONTRACT TEH WHOAL DUHVISHUN!!1!one
Fuck me. I am sick and tired of “Oh, I’ll be happy with mediocrity” crap like this from our own damn fans. Third seed….third seed my ASS. All that kind of stupidity does is give ammo to embittered SlugThugs and other assorted clowns that want nothing more than to keep the Southeast down, and I’ll be damned if I sit by and allow that to happen any longer.
The Red Wings aren’t selling out and are having trouble keeping their bandwagon STHs. I have two words to say to that:
You heard me: Boo hoo, the poor Red Wings are having attendance issues. My heart really bleeds for them–not.
What kills me is that there are excuses being made by one of the Deep Diggers: It’s the economy. The economy! The old double-standard is hard at work in Wings Nation, kids: It’s OK for a northern team like Detoilet to make excuses for falling attendance, but heaven forfend a southern team doesn’t sell out every game! Oh noez, we have to contract all those southern teams because they don’t sell out–but it’s OK for Detroit to have issues, because they’re Detroit.
Fuck Detroit, and fuck their excusemaking fans. All through Ragnarok, I had to put up with ar-tards like “Josh from MI” heaping scorn on the Hurricanes and calling for their contraction (along with the contraction of every other team south of Chicago and not named St. Louis or Washington) because they didn’t sell out every game–and the local economy taking a hit because of the dot-bomb bust just wasn’t acceptable, because those teams were down South where we clearly don’t know shit about shit that doesn’t involve constant high-speed left turns…and therefore we just don’t deserve to have the NHL.
If the Red Wings can’t sell out every game, then contract them. If it’s a good enough argument to be used on the Southerners, then it’s damn sure good enough to be used on the Yanquis and to hell with them and their excuses.
The Hurricanes have instituted a new rule at the RBC, which has a handful of fans plenty steamed:
“No autographs will be given during training camp, practices, or any pre-game skates while inside the RBC Center. Autographs are available after practice on regular practice days only, not after pre-game skates or after games.“
The reaction is a bit mixed, but there are a few folks that are all up in arms over this.
Personally? All for it–and I say this as somebody who used to hang out “out back” after just about every home game to say hey to folks, wave g’bye to team buses (and, if it was the Red Wings, to throw hexes on ‘em), and give good-natured grief to visiting fans. It was my social time, and I met a lot of neat people because of it. But I also saw more than a few freaky stalker types and more than a few sellers.
There were collectors, too; like Mike from Asheboro, who has possibly the biggest collection of hockey cards that I have ever seen (and wants to get as many of them signed as possible, just to say he did it), and the McConnell Clan with their 293774 kids (who have a collection that’s about as large). Those folks I do feel bad for, especially Mike–who drives up to Raleigh for just about every home game on nights when he’s gotta be to work early the next morning–and other fans that come from the far reaches of the Carolinas to see their team.
Hell, I’ve got my own collection of signed memorabilia that I hold dear. I would never sell any of it, and I have a moral objection to people that aren’t even fans and just want to sell signed merchandise for personal gain (especially people that use their kids (or unsuspecting fans–”hey, can you get this signed for me?”) to get autographs or–like notorious Thrashers “fan” Grandma (of whom poor Frankie Kaberle is scared shitless and about whom I and many Thrashers fans can tell quite a few stories), claim that it’s for their kids or grandkids only to turn around and hawk it on eBay or whatever). Folks like that, I have no sympathy for whatsoever.
And then there are the stalkers*–one of the more notorious ones was Pippi Longstalker, who has been stalking Bates Battaglia since the dawn of time it seems. This girl used to haunt practices and games (with her mother aiding and abetting her, no less!), hoping to get Batesy to notice her so she could land him as a meal ticket. She went to every Hurricanes game. And when I say every game, I mean every. game. Home AND road. This girl really got bad after I stopped hanging out “out back”–she’s followed Bates home on several occasions, once almost plowing right into a local TV news van in her haste to get on after Bates’ Escalade. People like that, I don’t feel sorry for.
Besides, as Miz Beth points out, we Caniacs still have it the best of any team in the NHL when it comes to getting your memorabilia signed by your favorite Hurricane (or ex-Cane). So stop frickin’ whining and get your ass to the RecZone on a practice day if you’re so all-fired hot to get a signature or two on your prized authentic $texas-costing RBK shoulder-piped funky-zoom System Shock Jersey. It’s not that hard, really.
Just my two cents on that–and at least now the RBC has something in writing, rather than engaging in their usual HUA nonsense of some securebots being properly programmed while the rest just get left to their AI’s own devices (which isn’t very I, if you ask me).
*:by “stalker”, I do not refer to those of us fans–male or female–that love to gawk at players they find hot. I guarantee you that the bulk of us that stood “out back” and make risqué comments about this or that player are gawkers, not stalkers.
DO SOMETHING ALREADY!
A sure sign that I’m bored? I’ve gone to pick a fight with some nubcakes who thinks that Eric Staal’s drunken hijinks are a sure sign that he’s headed down the Ron Mexico route. Because clearly, getting arrested by some bored county mounties for hollering at a vehicle or two after being ASLEEP AT ONE’S OWN BACHELOR PARTY is exactly the same as trying to smuggle pot onto a plane in a “diversion safe” (and then running from the heat after getting caught), bankrolling a dogfighting ring (and personally ordering the cruellest possible execution of losing dogs), and generally being a weeping sore in the ass-crack of society.
Hey George, did it hurt getting the CRAFTSMAN tattoo removed from your forehead? Seriously, I’m asking here.
The Fraud has cribbed a rumor from the Hurricanes website’s official boards about Aaron Ward returning to the ‘Canes from Bahstahn–which will never happen, unless there’s been a radical rethink in Beantown and JimR has finally gotten over getting hosed by Harry Sinden in the Glen Wesley deal* (which sent three first-rounders to the Bruins and hamstrung the Hurricanes’ farm system for years). And don’t get me started on the idiots and know-nothings that infest ch.com’s boards, because I’ll be here for the rest of the year.
Joe, Lord of Evil is now an Islander. Good luck–you’ll need it! (aside to Steve Zipay from Newsday: Joe’s Czech, not Slovak. Big difference.)
That’s the news, and I am off to play some Caesar IV.
*:I like Glen and recognize his great contributions to the team and community, but that doesn’t change the fact that the Bruins buggered the Whalers on the deal and exposed the sham that was the old RFA system.
So yesterday’s highlight–for me–was getting a text message telling me that Buffalo lost both their captains to free agency.
Well that and fending off Paco the Burrito Bandito’s latest attempt to clean out the store’s sandwich cooler without paying for anything. And trying not to fall asleep behind the wheel on the way home from work.
Now that I’ve had some sleep (and a chance to take a look at everything), I find myself laughing at the stupid money that’s being thrown around yet AGAIN this season. Tom Poti to the Crapitals for 3.5 bills per? Wow, thanks a lot for buggering the market for mid-to-low-end defensemen, GMGM. This time next year I’m sure somebody will be able to sign Marek Malik for 6Million per (and as much as I adore the cat, he’s no 6 Million Dollar Man). And now they’re thinking of signing Alexei Yashin? What? This is a joke, right?
And the Rangers, of course, are reverting back to their old ways by throwing idiotic money at every free agent that they think they can get their hands on. The more things change….
The ‘Canes, meanwhile, are content to hang back and let the dust clear–their only signing being Yet Another Midget. I am okay with this, since he should help us on shootouts, but of course half the folks at TheScoreBoards and the Hurricanes’ official site are whining and crying over the signing. Yeah, maybe we should have offered Scott Gomez $12Million per year for the next five years or something–that would have made a lot of sense, huh?
As for that Pitkanen trade that was blowing around the ‘Canes boards for a while….huh. Turns out Cooch went to Edmonton after all–and Philly, IMO, went almost as stupid as the Caps and Rangers.
(We interrupt this post for an important announcement: CONGRATULATIONS, TSN, ON SCHEDULING ONLY A SHORT DAY OF COVERAGE OF UFA DAY 1 TO SHOW NASCAR.** After that and Sportsnet getting the NHL to shove back the start time of a Leafs-Canes game so they could show a race in Toronto, I don’t ever EVER want to hear another NASCAR crack from anyone north of 49 again. EVER. We now return you to your regularly-scheduled thread, already in progress.)
Briere for 8 years at 6.5Million per? 10Million per for Timonen and 5.2Million per for Hartnell? Homer, have you fallen off the wagon again? Was Bobby the Brainless in the room with you holding a gun to your dog’s head or something, to make you sign those completely asinine deals? Seriously mang, I’m worried about you.
I dunno, kids–I don’t think anyone was smart with their signings yesterday. The smart folks, IMO, are the Carolinas and Ottawas and Tampas that are hanging back and letting the “big spenders” get themselves in cap trouble so that they can capitalize later.
The more things change….
**: This very belated edit is to amend a misunderstanding on my part–TSN only scheduled 3 hours of coverage to show Neckcar. Apparently that’s supposed to make it still OK for Canadians to crack Neckcar jokes about hockey teams south of the Mason-Dixon Line, but this blogger ain’t havin’ it.
So–a SlugThug has decided to engage me in the commentbox of this post, claiming that the Hurricanes are “one of the 5 worst champions of the last 20 years” (let me guess, the 1999 Dallas Stars are in that group too, right?) and that “the numbers prove it”. He’s blithely ignored requests from one of my compadres to explain the Sabres’ craptacular record against the Southeast Division in 05-06 by invoking the “everything I say three times is true” rule, and he’s apparently decided to come back and attempt to reassert whatever dominance he thinks he’s already asserted after a two-week hiatus (gee, couldn’t have ANYTHING to do with the Sabres advancing to the ECF now, would it?)
I get what he’s trying to do–he’s trying to browbeat me into “admitting” that the ‘Canes “stole” a Cup that “rightfully” belonged to the Sabres last season. He’s trying to maneuver me into “admitting” that the Hurricanes “didn’t deserve to win” a Cup that “belonged” to the Sabres (even though their team’s name is not now and never has been on it). And that’s not going to happen. That’s never going to happen–and you know why?
Because the team that deserves it is the team that wins it. Always. Breaks or no breaks, great luck or not-so-great luck.
I believe I have mentioned something like this before–not my fault if you choose to disregard it, kids (and hey, whaddaya know, I also said something in the past about acting the fool in another team’s house–hey wow, the more things change…)
You can claim that Buffalo has
more thuggish better fans (which makes me laugh, considering that their attendance was worse than the Hurricanes’ at the start of this decade–and the Rigas debacle is not an acceptable excuse, Sabres fans. If the Leafs could sell out their building year after year in the 70s and 80s despite incompetent/criminal ownership and a bottom-feeding team, you should have done the same), you can claim that Buffalo is a festering cesspit a better town, you can claim whatever you want–but the cream always rises to the top, whether one likes it or not. If the Sabres win–and that is still a huge IF, because they haven’t even started the Conference Finals yet much less the Cup Finals–then, obviously, they deserve it despite the genetic sludge that comprises the overwhelming bulk of their fanbase and good for them.
But you can’t have it both ways, bittermen. You can’t claim that the Hurricanes were 2nd in the East only because they play in the Southeast Division without admitting that the Sabres are 1st overall because they played well in the Northeast Division (with an identical divisional record to the 05-06 Hurricanes, I might add: 18-11-3).
You also can’t bash the N&O for trying to cater to n00b fans last season without bashing Buffalo’s mayor for talking this season about how the Sabres have attracted a bunch of n00bs (NYT link, login required) that didn’t follow hockey before.
But I guess none of that counts, since the Hurricanes are south of the Mason-Dixon Line–right?
Go to Hel, Buffalo–and take the Red Wings with you.
This season’s playoff whipping boy is, apparently, none other than the Nashville Predators–because Alexander Radulov got suspended (and rightly so) for a hit that even most Preds fans on the net agree was totally unnecessary, and because Scott Hartnell got a game misconduct in Game 1 for laying out Jonathan Cheechoo (a hit that I personally think was pretty foolish).
All of a sudden, the Predators are a bunch of dirty no-good thugs, Nashville doesn’t deserve a team, their fans are morons….
Oh wait, various fuckheads on the Net have been saying those last two things for ages.
FlyersTV Comcast OLN Versus has been harping on the first one, however, and making the Sharks out to be innocent martyrs.
How conveniently we forget that the Sharks are not nearly so innocent as Clement Clement Hands of Cement and his little friends would have us believe. At least the Preds didn’t do the double-team thing right off the faceoff in the last five minutes of the game. But since the Preds are south of the Mason-Dixon Line, I guess it’s fashionable to bash them left right and center (and, if you’re a Wings fan, to make fat jokes and drop redneck smack on anyone who dares defend them–I’m betting that if the Wings get punted again, at least a few of ‘em will be hopping on the Sabres bus so they can hang with kindred spirits).
The more things change….
‘Canes got pwnt by the Mo-ple Leafs, and then got pwnt by the LAST PLACE Flyers. They’re now in a position where they have to go 4-1 in their last five games to make the playoffs (which I’m sure has a martyr-complexed mentally defective X-ray technician in a certain northern state salivating), and a handful of noobs are screaming for Lavi to be fired because “he isn’t any good”–but you know what?
I don’t care.
You heard me:
This team has their future in their own hands–they always have. Hakuna Matata, folks. That’s been my mantra all season, and it’ll still be my mantra. So what if they got pwnt? I don’t control the Hurricanes’ destiny, they do. Sure, I’m not happy about those losses. But so what? I’m not the one out there on the ice. I’m not the one getting frustrated at missing chances and looking like I’m skating through mud and giving the impression that I’m resting on my laurels. The ‘Canes are the ones who have to live with the shame of getting taken out to the woodshed by their former coach and the worst team in the League, not me.
If the ‘Canes deserve to make the playoffs, they’ll make the playoffs. If not, then they’ll have time to rest up for next season. No excuses. No giving a tinker’s damn what fans of other teams think. And certainly no regrets, because what needs to happen will happen regardless of what all of us armchair coaches think.
It never fails–the team plays like drokk, and the UNC fans in the audience jump off the bandwagon while the State fans scream for the coach’s head and look for somebody to blame. In this case, the blame is being placed (by some) on the Warchief.
Miz Mer has posted her thoughts on the subject. She may be a noob, but she’s a good grasp of the situation. A couple of the more intelligent folks on teh LGC have weighed in, but for the most part the thread’s a bastion of foolishness.
My favorite line in the thread to which Mer is referring to is this one:
One thing that is interesting to note……. How many TV, Radio and newspaper quotes to you hear from the captain this year? Not very many!
You want to talk about things that make you go “huh?” for a moment? Try that one on for size–of course, the bloke who posted that gem is the same bloke who once said on a long-since-defunct message board that having a ticket should be a GUARANTEE of a win…so there y’go.
My thoughts? If I’m going to blame somebody, I’m sticking with the “It’s not about me, it’s about the guy in front of me” philosophy and blaming pretty much the whole team…with the proviso that there’s only so much one can do about injuries upon injuries. As long as this isn’t a total Season From Hell redux, I’m not really going to get overly upset about anything except slackitude. Gotta show that consistent effort, guys.
No really, it will.
I’m sure the motards on the Devils boards are having a fun little virtual wankfest right now (I know the shitbag who’s decided to flood my inbox sure is–and I hope he enjoys his account for the short time he’ll still have it), but I really don’t care.
I swore I would wait until the quarter mark of the season to say anything, and I am. So if you’re expecting me to excoriate the team, the fans, or even Holly freakin’ Wilver you might as well just move on and get back to me in about December or so.
Oh yeah–and we still have our names on the Cup. Have a nice day.
Jack Johnson staying at UMich; Dancin’ Dad says “fuck y’all haters.”This is not at all a surprise–and good on Luke for getting that quote in at the end of the article, even though it hasn’t stopped random members of the Idiot Brigade from posting stuff like this on thescoreboards.com’s Hurricanes board:
No offense but he has no intention of staying 4 years and getting a degree. I truly believe this has nothing to do with education.
I don’t think JJ ever intends to wear the red eye. I’d dump him now. Blasphemy some will say, but the kid obviously has his head so far up his posterior, that he doesn’t know night from day. He’s either WAY too imature to play in the NHL, or his family has Lindros Syndrome (do you even know the story behind Eric Lindros’ refusal to play for the Nordiques? Or do you just like saying that so that you sound intelligent? Seriously, I’m asking here). Either way, this kid has trouble written all over him. Trade him, or his rights to the first sucker to offer something. I say it again, he’ll never wear a Canes sweater.
I’m not even going to bother with the Hurricanes’ official website boards, but I’m sure there’s even more cerebellum-rotting venom to be had over there.
Whatever–but at least SOMEBODY in the Johnson family addressed the mistaken belief that JJ is staying in school just so that his rights will run out and he’ll be able to sign with the Pens and be reunited with his best buddy Sid Crosby. As I’ve said 238947243 times before: the kid has said that he wants to win an NCAA title at UMich like his father did, and that when that happens (or when he graduates, whichever comes first) he’ll be more than proud to don the Sightless Eye of Carolina. He’s never deviated from this, and he’s never even so much as hinted otherwise. JimR, on the other hand, jumped the gun when he presumed that JJ would be as easily swayed as…oh, I dunno, David Tanabe. I can understand his and Lavi’s frustration, but at the same time? I’d say it’s largely self-induced.
IN OTHER NEWS:
Jason Woolley has been added to the training camp roster–which has a couple people going “YEAH BABY”, but me? Errrr….not so sure I like this one. But then, last season I wasn’t overly enthused with the signing of Frankie Kaberle; so there you go.
(p.s. Dear TSN; The News and Observer is in RALEIGH, not Charlotte. Plz to pull heads out of posteriors and check your facts every now and then, kkthx.)