Sweet Tea, Barbecue, and Bodychecks

And of course, I missed it cos I was at work. Story of my life, kids.

Anyway–the big news of the day (if you were a Caniac) was a two-parter:

1) JimR did about what people expected him to do: nothing.

2) Aaron Ward found himself traded at the request of Jaromir Jagr–to Boston.

The latter is of some interest to me personally, because of course my favorite player is a Ranger. Well that, and I’ve had fun taking shots at Jagr ever since he played for Your Nation’s Crapitals. Word round the campfire is that AWard showed some sack and stood up to the Kladno Knucklehead after said knucklehead took the veteran defenseman to task for allegedly making a defensively sound play rather than simply acting as a pitching machine for the team captain and the rest of the NY Czech Mafia’s K-Rad Foward Krewe.

gg AWard–enjoy playing in Beantown for the only other owner in the NHL besides Bill Wirtz who doesn’t want to win a Cup. Jagr je holka!

As for us:

I really don’t see that there was anything JimR could do, thanks to folks like Don Waddell et al. overpaying for guys like a shattered Todd Bertuzzi and Keith Tkachuk. Keep your order in your mind and your money in your hand, Walt. The folks at the Varsity are there to serve you after every practice.

At least Ray Whitney didn’t get traded–which means that, despite the hopes of some “fans” to the contrary, the ‘Canes aren’t even close to packing it in this season.

Hope. Gotta love it, don’t you?

Unless, of course, you’re a Thrashers fan–in which case you’re wondering WTF your GM is smoking.

Let’s be real here, kids–Don Waddell should have been fired by the Thrashers three seasons ago. The dude’s got little if any mojo as a GM, as far as I’m concerned.

DWGM’s first ever NHL draft pick: Patrik Stefan, who the Thrashers rushed to take over guys like Nick Boynton, the Sedinbots, Frankie Kaberle, Martin Erat, Ryan Miller, Henrik Zetterberg, and Martin Havlat. You know, guys that are still playing and have actually done something other than get concussions, play like a career AHLer, and pwn himself in front of an empty-net.

Sure, he’s gotten some good ones since then–Heatley, Kovalchuk, Lehtonen (though his groin issues are calling that pick into question)–but overall his drafting history? Meh. And that is saying something, when you consider that the team I barrack for has what is generally considered the worst (and is definitely the smallest) scouting staff in the NHL.

And trades? Let’s see….Dany Heatley for Marian Hossa–OK, I can dig that. But it only comes out as a good thing for Atlanta if the Thrashers ever make the playoffs and wind up doing better than the Sens. Braydon Coburn for Alexei Zhitnik? Glen Metropolit, a first-rounder, a second rounder (2008), and a third rounder(2007) for Keith “Pass the donuts” Tkachuk? And ANOTHER first-rounder if they re-sign the guy?

Don’t bogart that joint, my friend. Pass it over to me.

And don’t get me started on the debacle that was Turin. Derian Hatcher, Don? Mike “I’m going to do what I want instead of what Coach tells me to do?” Modano? Letting your coach take the fall because some of the older guys on the team didn’t even listen to him? What the hells were you thinking there, mang? Were you hitting the same sauce as Wayne Gretzky was when he chose Team Canada? Did you two share a crackpipe or something? Seriously, I’m asking here.

Next up: DWGM guarantees a playoff spot for the Thrashers, and the team responds by promptly tanking even more than they’re tanking already.

You heard it here first.

ahem.

This season’s team is reminding me more and more of the 05-06 Lightning. Same slack play, same “yeah, we’re champs–fuck it” attitude…the only thing that we don’t have is a mouthy Italian coach. Well that, and our captain didn’t get waived.

I think that the ‘Canes can take a page from the Lightning of last season, and keep the core of the team together rather than wigging out and trading everyone. I mean, look at this season. The Lightning lead the Division again now, and I don’t think they’re quite done yet–and they’ve done it with many of the same guys that they had last season and the season before.

Just sayin’.

I listened to the game last night while engaging in some apartment-cleaning and cat wrangling, and everything sounded fine until Marian Hossa tied the game.

The aliens took their cue from that, and replaced the Hurricanes with the Pod People. When the score went up 3-1 in a matter of about a minute or so, I just kinda sighed and went back to Mr. Muscle-ing the oven. Oh well, right?

I’ve got some more thoughts on the “OMF TRAID TEH ENTIAR TEAM!!!1″ foolishness that’s flooding the message boards, but I’ll hold off on them until later today.

Go Canes.

Well. One bad game, and all of a sudden half the passengers are off the bus and screaming that the team sucks and everyone needs traded yesterday–even Ray Whitney, who is our leading scorer.

My favorite bit of idiocy from the boards was the moron who said that JimR “never should have let Cullen go”.

I’m sorry, but for 4 bills per? The Rangers can have him and his 15 points.

And then there’s “The Captain”–an idiot who only shows up after a loss to tell everyone on teh LGC how he’s such a better fan than everyone else because he boos the team whenever they play like ass and leaves early when the other team ties or scores a go-ahead goal. And if you take issue with him and have two X chromosomes, then obviously you’re just a puckbunny who’s trying to get the players’ attention by defending them. I have a sneaking suspicion that he might be that “Brian” fuckhead that trolled the crap out of the Oilers blogs during the SCF after Games 1, 2, 3, and 7 but was nowhere to be seen when the ‘Canes lost games 4, 5, and 6–but that is, of course, mere supposition.

edit: It’s not “Brian”. It’s DrFrankLives, apparently–and as you can see by the comments, he is none too happy at being pimpslapped.

The ‘Canes, when they lose, have tended to lose in rather asstacular fashion. There is no doubting that. But even when they lost last season, they tended to lose in rather asstacular fashion–how can so many of us have forgotten that? Oh wait, I know; it’s because the ‘Canes aren’t up at the top of the Conference like they were at this time last season. Right, how silly of me to forget.

See, this is when the…the…I can barely bring myself to say it…the collegiate mindset of the bulk of the Caniac Nation (est. 1997) drives me right up the damn wall. I just want to take huge signs to games that say THIS IS NOT COLLEGE SPORTS and MY TEAM RIGHT OR WRONG, because I am so sick and freaking tired of people that can’t get out of that stupid-ass college sports (specifically the ACC) mindset, where the team are gods when they win and miserable wastes of space when they lose–and anyone who dares to take issue with it isn’t a Real Fan<tm>.

Whatever. I think it’s far more damning for the fans to stick around and do absolutely nothing when the team doesn’t even try. Stay for the whole game and don’t even bother cheering, if the team isn’t even trying to win. That’ll send a far stronger message than leaving or booing the home team will. Chat with your seatmates, have a beer, whatever–that’s what I did last night (except for the beer part).

Or y’all can just follow through on your petty little threats to turn in your tickets, not show up for the playoffs, and just take your fairweather ass right back to the Dean Dome.

Your call, peeps.

…I’m scheduling my teammates to come clean my house, cook my dinner, wash my car, walk my dog, and whatever else I can think of for them to do.

After the way they played in front of him tonight?  Yeah. The whole game was long stretches of can’t-do-shit-right punctuated by brief flashes of competence, for the Hurricanes. Yeah, my boy played decently and showed off his ‘leet Jedi skillz. But I went to barrack for the crest on the front, not the name on the back y’know?

Anyway. 40 and 440 were miles-long parking lots for most of the early-evening, so the RBC didn’t start to fill up until about ten minutes or so into the first period. I was actually pretty happy to be there, even though I had a feeling the night was going to kinda suck. Rapped with J.P. Giglio from the N&O outside for a couple minutes while I was waiting for Nate to get there with my ticket–always good to see J.P. at a game. It felt like old times. I waited and waited and waited for my friend Debbie from Tampa to show (she was coming to the game with her brother, who lives in Charlotte), but struck out. I didn’t see her at all (and really, how hard is it to miss a tall blonde wearing a white Messier jersey at the RBC Center?)–which was a serious bummer, because I was wanting to give her an update on a mutual friend of ours whose hubby got hit head-on by an idiot (not drunk, just an idiot teenager showing off for his buddies) last night.

(He’s in stable condition–lots of facial lacerations, bumps/bruises, some short-term memory issues, and a few broken bones (and a possible lawsuit because the airbag on his brand-new Lexus failed to deploy), but otherwise he’s OK)

The game itself started off okay, but it got really dull really quick after Cam made this amazing flurry of saves when his defense hung him out to dry for the first time. Not many good hits, a lackluster fight between Mike Commodore and Ryan Hollweg livened things up for about five minutes (the fight was a draw), and a quick trade of goals toward the end marked the first period. From then on, it was pretty much all Rangers all the time. There were a whole pack of Rangers fans sitting behind me in 332–it was rather amusing to hear them fall silent when they’d try to start a LET’S GO RANGERS chant only to have me fire back with JAGR JE HOLKA. I think somebody told them what it meant sometime around the middle of the second, though, because the falling-silent thing kinda stopped about then.

The crowd itself was pretty slack in terms of enthusiasm (except for 328 of course)–but I can’t say I blame them because the team played complete and total ass. Despite the loss, I was very happy to be at the game. I got a promotion at work (I am now the manager who rules the night), which means that the chance of me going to very many more games is pretty well hosed. So I treasure every game that I do get to come to, because I don’t know when I’ll get to hit the RBC again.

And I got a really sick thrill out of seeing Shanahan get pasted in the kisser.

I have Tuesday off, so hopefully I’ll get to go to that game. We’ll see.  Have a good night.

For the first time in what seems like eons, I’ll be at the RBC Center watching the ‘Canes throw down with the Rangers–ironically, the last game I went to at the RBC Center was Canes-Rangers.

I’ll be up in Section 332 Row A, proudly wearing my Malik jersey. Come say hey–Tapeleg can verify that I don’t bite (unless you’re somebody that’s pissed me off recently, but even then you’re safe because the Tramadol I take for my back will suppress the urge to beat the crap out of you).

I’ll post my sorry excuse for a game recap after I get home (and probably rap a little about my yob, too).

Go ‘Canes.

Babs’ suspension lifted.

And the boy will report to Albany, like he was asked to do a week ago and like he should have done to start with. This is, of course, a showcase for a trade–but I can’t imagine what we’ll trade him for, given how his little stunt has hurt his standing in the eyes of not only this team, but other teams as well.

“Yeah, I have a contract–but I’ll honour it only when it suits ME.”

Sure, I’d trade for him if I were a GM! So what if he’s some unvarnished kid who got his name on the Cup only cos his team’s GM begged the right folks? He’s gotta be worth somebody (or something) good, right?

Err….yeah.

I don’t think we’ll be seeing him in the Sightless Eye again.

No, I’m not quitting–sorry to disappoint some of y’all.

Toolbag Junior, however, is. Well, he’s not going to write anymore anyway. I’ll miss telling him to shaddap come playoff time.

Luck in the new position, Ned.

‘Canes reacquire Joe, Lord of Evil, My Man Ryan Bayda recalled from Albany.

WELL. This is certainly interesting, I’d say. The reactions from the Nation are mixed–some love it, some hate it (and vehemently so–one douche on thescoreboards.com was all about repeating his disapproval IN REALLY LARGE BOLDFACE LETTERS WITH LOTS OF SMILIES IN CASE ANYONE MISSED IT THE FIRST TIME), and some (like me) are wondering if there’s another shoe that’s about to drop.

I’ll be honest; I can go either way with Joe, Lord of Evil. Kinda like he can go either way when he steps on the ice.

Anyway. My gut feeling is that, like in 03-04, Joe’s going to be put on a wing in the hopes that he can do something there. Not that my gut feeling is being driven by a hurtin’ on Cory and Erik or anything.

Just sayin’.

Yeah so y’all know how I hate blowing my own horn right?

So check this out. I gots pub in The Hockey News!

5. The NHL Blogosphere Has Zest. CasonBlog is stylishly witty, and Battle of Alberta’s “Beard Talk” post had me LOL during the playoffs. But the Acid Queen and God Send Jen show that female fans can hold their own.

WELL.

First Bristol, now The Hockey News. Are they trying to get me to like them?

A couple friends of mine asked why I went up on the mountaintop a while back, why I left when all kinds of juicy stuff started coming down the pike and people were surely hanging on my every word about such things as Vote For Rory and Sid Crosby getting chucked from a Dallas nightclub after the ASG cos he’s underage.

I didn’t care much about any of that. I was more concerned with my complete and total inability to get upset over the Hurricanes’ performance so far this season–performance that is decidedly less than stellar.

Had the Cup win somehow made me less of a fan? Had I lost my desire to see my team win? Was I still in shock?

And then it hit me: What had happened wasn’t the win itself. It was the Cup. Specifically, it was my finally getting to lay hands on the Cup.

As I said on HLOG:

You cannot touch that thing after your team has won it, can’t dip your hand in the pool of history and emotion that the thing is bathed in, and come away unaffected by it in some way. Anyone who says otherwise is either lying or dead inside.

There’s a a word for that pool in Old English: mægen. Main. It’s a spiritual energy that every living thing has. To relate it to hockey: it’s what makes a playoff game so electric. It’s what spurs a team on to great deeds. Objects absorb mægen from people that use them, that touch them–ask any craftsman who uses the tools that his (or her) parents and grandparents used if they feel like their ancestor who used those tools are watching over them and guiding their hands, and I guarantee you that the answer will be “yes”.

I keep coming back to the image of Mike Keenan sitting in his living room with the Cup, staring silently at it all night and letting its spirits quietly tell their stories to him until the sun rose and he was finally moved to tears. It’s such a powerful image, seeing somebody so moved like he looked upon the face of God and touched the stars.

When I silently ran my fingers over the upper rings and bowl of the Cup back in September of ‘06, I plunged my hands into that deep pool of mægen like so many others have done before. In those few moments, I reached back through the years and shook hands with Howie Morenz and Bill Barilko and Maurice Richard and Georges Vezina and Sid Abel and all the other einherjar that have won the Cup and since moved on to play in the Eternal Game, and I came away forever changed by it.

The moment was epiphanic, an amazing moment of revelation where I finally felt like everything really was going to be OK–like an explorer cresting a rise and seeing the Seven Cities of Cibola laid out in front of him with the Fountain of Youth in the middle. I can honestly say that I wish every fan could experience it.

I still feel like I’m not properly articulating how it felt to be quite honest, but hopefully all of you will one day get to experience the wonder for yourselves.

Mahalo.

Babs tells the org to get stuffed. Org tells Babs to go to his room and think about what he’s done.

I just love waking up to crap like this, I really do.

In a nutshell: Anton Babchuk was asked to report to Albany of the AHL now that Frankie’s back–it was a temporary move, and done only because somebody had to be sent down and Babs was the only one of our guys not subject to waivers.

“He wants to think about it.”

What is there to think about? “Dude, spend a little time in Albany until we get somebody else traded. It’s not permanent.” What’s so hard about that? Even Babs with his so-so (at best) English skills should be able to understand that. And then there’s this little gem, courtesy of the N&O’s ‘Canes blog:

Jay Grossman, Anton Babchuk’s agent, said his client doesn’t feel he’s a minor-league player and would prefer the Hurricanes trade him to another NHL team.

Hurricanes general manager Jim Rutherford suspended Babchuk on Wednesday after the 22-year-old defenseman refused to report to Albany (AHL) when the Canes sent him down to clear a spot for Frantisek Kaberle on Tuesday.

“After playing well and for a good part of the season, especially at the beginning, in the top four, playing more than 20 minutes a night, he doesn’t feel he’s a minor-league player,” Grossman said. “I know there’s interest out there and teams that view it the same way. At the same time, we understand the prediciment Jim faces. We’ve been communicating regarding that and we’ll see what happens.”

Babchuk appeared in 51 of Carolina’s first 55 games, and his 14 points are second only to Mike Commodore among Carolina defensemen.

How many teams are going to ask about the kid, given this little stunt? Come on Jay, surely you’re smarter than that you little slimeball. And are you aware that this stunt has pretty much screwed the ‘Canes over by ruining whatever trade value that Babs had? And after the org moved the heavens and the earth to get the kid’s name on the Cup too. Classy.
“We had to do it, it’s the rules.”

If the kid stays, it’ll be because the coaches want him to stay or because Ron Francis advises JimR not to trade him.

Sheesh.

(photo courtesy N&O photog Chris Seward)
http://www.newsobserver.com/796/story/539324.html

Regardless of one’s political leanings, it’s still pretty damn cool for a team’s fans to have their team at the White House after they win a championship. I just wish that the N&O had had somebody who can actually write a good article on the trip, rather than Barbara Barrett (of whose writing I have never been enamored).

And yes, Aaron Ward, Martin Gerber, and Matt “Tim Curry’s Younger Brother” Cullen are all in that photo–according to Canes’ Media Czar Mike Sundheim’s fabulously-executed running writeup, they were standing there outside the terminal with their thumbs out so they could hitch a lift.

Doug Weight, Mark Recchi, Joe, Lord of Evil and Kevyn Adams couldn’t make it because of transcendent commitments, Great Leader Pete Karmanos couldn’t make it because he’s laid up recovering from surgery, and the new guys didn’t make the trip because of course they weren’t abtakha until after 19 June.

Hopefully this visit will boost the team’s morale and get them back on the proper path, starting with tonight’s game v. the Boston Bruins. Puck drops at 8:30, but of course I’ll be working so I’ll have to call my Score Bitch for updates at 9:00 and 11:00.

Love my promotion–hate my scheduling.

It never fails–the team plays like drokk, and the UNC fans in the audience jump off the bandwagon while the State fans scream for the coach’s head and look for somebody to blame. In this case, the blame is being placed (by some) on the Warchief.

Miz Mer has posted her thoughts on the subject. She may be a noob, but she’s a good grasp of the situation. A couple of the more intelligent folks on teh LGC have weighed in, but for the most part the thread’s a bastion of foolishness.

My favorite line in the thread to which Mer is referring to is this one:

One thing that is interesting to note……. How many TV, Radio and newspaper quotes to you hear from the captain this year? Not very many!

You want to talk about things that make you go “huh?” for a moment? Try that one on for size–of course, the bloke who posted that gem is the same bloke who once said on a long-since-defunct message board that having a ticket should be a GUARANTEE of a win…so there y’go.
My thoughts? If I’m going to blame somebody, I’m sticking with the “It’s not about me, it’s about the guy in front of me” philosophy and blaming pretty much the whole team…with the proviso that there’s only so much one can do about injuries upon injuries. As long as this isn’t a total Season From Hell redux, I’m not really going to get overly upset about anything except slackitude. Gotta show that consistent effort, guys.