Courtesy of Kukla’s NHL Korner:

I had enough of the same or typical question syndrome and decided to do something about it. Recently I approached the Washington Capitals with a propostion — Would AO be able to answer some questions from the hockey fans worldwide? Their response was “certainly”, with one stipulation. The questions must be unique, not the “typical” questions we have heard over and over.

This is like giving me entree into a china shop and saying “Mow ‘em down, sweetie.” Seriously–asking me to come up with unique questions?  Oh man, what I could ask…..
But I decided that it might be a wise idea to not be TOO unique, so I dove into the fray with these little family-friendly pearls of wiseassery wisdom:

Alex,

You’ve scored on your feet. You’ve scored flat on your back. When are you going to try winning a shootout with a goal scored from between your legs?

And when you play the Devils next, are you planning to hang a five-spot or so on Martin Brodeur as payback for him whining about your Robocop-visor and getting it banned?

Honestly, I don’t think he’ll answer that second one–he doesn’t strike me as a spiteful chap, so I’m pretty sure he won’t be personally giving Brodeur a case of sunburn on the back of his neck and then laughing in his face saying “HA HA, CRY MORE NOOB”. Of course, I’m sure that the kid might try a little harder to score on the guy for the sake of “just because.” Nothin’ personal, of course–’s just hockey.

Happy Halloween/Samhain/All Saint’s/whatever, kids. Don’t take any funky-smelling popcorn balls and look out for those Blue Star tattoos.